Today is International Women’s Day. The 100th anniversary of International Women’s Day no less.

*fanfare*

More importantly, as New Boyfriend helpfully pointed out this morning, whilst encouraging me to enjoy my day ‘being independent and thinking about voting and what-not’, it is also British Pie Week. Excellent. I can kill two birds with one stone and celebrate my release from the constraints of the kitchen by making a nice pie.

I do actually feel like I have done my bit for IWD this year, not least with my campaign for equal rights to orgasms. You may remember a couple of weeks ago I had a bit of a rant about my local arts centre’s plans for the day – a celebration of the social, economic and political achievements of women in the form of knitting, foot reading and a spot of afternoon yoga. All very lovely in its place, but it hardly felt inspirational – “that’s right ladies, reach for the sky! You can do it! Fantastic… That’s right, now bend down and touch your toes…” Hmmm… View Post

Today I have been thinking about orgasms.

According to New Boyfriend, the natural ratio of male to female orgasms – ‘me time’ and sex toys aside – is five to one, three to one if you’re lucky. Apparently this is Nature’s Way. Something to do with cavemen and childbirth.

I’m pretty sure he is just saying this to wind me up, which seems to be the case with 95% of the things he says, but it did make me wonder.

“Ask anyone,” he said, “it’s just a fact.”

“Rubbish,” I countered, “women are definitely supposed to have more. How about I ask some of your friends next week?”

“Go on then…” he challenged.

“Fine, I will,” I said, easily wound up as I am. “You know it’s the kind of thing I would ask…”

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Today I took Bee for her school leaver inoculations.

Bee was one of the first group of babies to get the Red Book, formally known as the Personal Child Health Record, and as you can see, being a child myself at the time, I decorated Bee’s with stickers:

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This month saw the arrival of my second post-Christmas credit card statement. I felt rather pleased with myself opening it, because I knew that even though I accidentally spent about £1,500 on it on Christmas presents, I paid off the balance almost completely in the first week of January.

*looks smug*

So self-satisfied was I in fact, that I almost wanted to punch myself in the face.

My eye was caught though by the line telling me I had ‘£13,416 available to spend’.

Hmm…

£13,416 is quite a lot of money…

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Having calmed down from my fury of Thursday night, and after agreeing to balance the crafts and foot rubs with a workshop on women in the media, I’ve got a quick weekend competition for you. Just to lighten the mood. I’m going to be quick though, as Take Me Out has just started. (Seriously, how great is Take Me Out?? No likey, no lighty…)

Here’s the deal…

Aromettes are a new coffee thing from Douwe Egberts. It’s like ordinary ground coffee, but pressed into single serving bean shapes. Not only does the process apparently lock in the flavour, but they also look very cute in a glass jar.

I’ve tried some, and they were pretty nice. You can get them exclusively in Tesco from Monday if you want some of your own.

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What kind of parent are you?

Photo by Nick Wilkes on Unsplash

Most of us have a vague idea in our heads of the kind of parent we want to be.

Maybe you want to be the strict one, the kind of parent that can get homework done swiftly with just a carefully raised eyebrow, or perhaps you’d rather be the ‘they’re going to do it anyway so I’d rather it was under my roof’ type, who dishes out cans of Strongbow and condoms every weekend.

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