This week, one of my favourite bloggers, Mommy has a Headache, tagged me in a post, asking me to come up with my recipe for a perfect man – the top ten things I look for in a potential partner. As she pointed out, it could be great advertising after all. If you can tick seven or more, please invite me out for dinner.
I fully appreciate of course that my Mr Right will very likely match up to none of these things. I have been in a flighty mood this week though, so I was glad of an excuse not to do some real work. So, here goes:
My perfect man would make me laugh. A lot.
He must have an appreciation of the basics of grammar. I’m not saying I’d kick a man out of bed for the odd spelling mistake, but I would very happily turn down any invitation along the lines of ‘can i take u out 4 dinner?’
He would ideally enjoy cooking, washing up and other household chores.
He would compliment me, lust after me, make me feel gorgeous and sexy and desirable. At dinner parties he would touch my leg under the table and give me looks that said ‘I need to have you right now. Make your excuses and meet me on the landing in two minutes’.
He would mix a mean cocktail, and would be able to do clever tricks throwing bottles and ice up in the air.
He would be caring, and thoughtful and kind, but not afraid to take control and push me hard against a wall when necessary. Literally and metaphorically.
He would be understanding of my habit of buying books I know I will never read.
Mr Perfect would be sociable and like all my friends, and I would like his. He would say things like ‘why don’t we have some people round for dinner this weekend, I fancy making a lovely big chilli, drinking some beer and playing some scrabble’.
He must be able to love the inconsistencies in my personality – I am fiercely independent, but want to be looked after. I appear confident and self-assured, but have strong doubts about my self-worth. That sort of thing.
He must not twiddle the hair on his moles during lunch.
And that’s it. Not much to ask is it?