OK, it’s not that bad really, not blood and guts gruesome, but everyone I’ve told in real life has been consistently repulsed, so I thought I would share – lucky you!
I recently went on a date, a blind date in fact, with a man I met through a dating site before I got too scared and hid my profile, and who I had kept in touch with via email.
It was a fairly regular, suitably awkward first date in most ways. I arrived early and settled myself on a sofa with the paper so I could be calm and collected when he arrived, and not do my usual trick of turning up ten minutes late, fighting the urge to run away and hide under a duvet. I was served by a rather dishy waiter, who maintained eye contact for slightly longer than was strictly necessary, and who rather threw me off my stride as a result – I couldn’t help but keep glimpsing him throughout the lunch and thinking ‘Hmm… I’d rather be on a date with you…’
My date didn’t do himself any favours by bigging up how amazingly witty and amusing he was before we had even met – I think it’s generally a mistake to raise people’s expectations. Sure, he wasn’t totally dull, but he was no David Mitchell. Personally I go with the ‘God no, me? I’m really boring, nothing to say…’. That way people can only be pleasantly surprised.
He talked a lot about himself, fuelled by me asking a range of interesting and thoughtful questions, but didn’t ask me much in return, (not that you’re getting a one-sided account of this at all…) – to be fair I think we were both equally bored with each other after an hour and a half.
There was one thing though that distracted me throughout the entire lunch.
On his cheek he had a mole.
Nothing wrong with that.
Out of the mole were growing several hairs.
Still, that’s fine – a bit Nanny McPhee, but I’m not going to judge him on that.
While he talked, he constantly twiddled the hair on his mole. With a finger and thumb. Almost thoughtfully.
This man had an almost beard. If he’d wanted to twiddle some kind of facial hair he had plenty of options. Whether he thought mole-hair-twiddling was something the ladies dig, or whether he was even aware of it I don’t know, but suffice to say it was a bit of a deal breaker for me.
Is that me being fussy? I know people have bad habits, I have plenty of them myself, but I do try and keep them hidden as much as possible on the first day at least…