I had some friends to stay this weekend.
“What’s with all the posts you’ve been writing lately?” one asked, referring to the rather extensive range of blogging tips I’ve been sharing lately. “I couldn’t even understand half the words.”
“Ah yes,” I explained, “it’s all to do with this new job with Collective Bias you see, supporting my blogger community and all that.”
I can see though that it would be a bit dull for those of you who aren’t especially interested in wordpress plugins. So how about this – today I weighed myself for the first time in about six months.
Dum dum dum!!
I had to take the scales down into the kitchen as the rest of the house is carpeted, (what loon puts carpet in a bathroom?), and stood for a while looking at them, looking at Boyfriend, and then looking back.
“I’m not going to weigh myself with you stood right there,” I said, which is ridiculous as he sees me naked every day and isn’t suddenly going to say ‘blimey, you’re really chubby, I hadn’t even noticed!’ Still, it felt weird.
He relented, after some mild complaining, and I stepped on. (I had made sure to go to the toilet first obviously, and take my phone out of my dressing gown pocket. It all helps.)
The scales strained beneath me.
I looked down, hopefully.
I gasped. I was ONE WHOLE STONE heavier than I was expecting to be. A whole stone! I don’t just mean a stone over my ‘perfect’ weight, I mean a stone over the weight I was guessing I might be, which is already just a tiny *ahem* smidgen over the ideal.
It was a bit of a shock. I knew that I’d probably put on a few pounds – you can’t keep a jar of sweets on your desk and not get a little bit chunky – but a whole stone?? How did this happen? If I keep up this pace then one of my 40 things to do before I’m 40 will be to be airlifted from my own bed and nobody wants to be the star of a Channel 5 real life documentary.
Action was required. A banana was eaten, a calorie counting app downloaded. I even had skimmed milk on my cereal. Gross.
I wish I’d stuck to counting Twitter followers.