Welcome to my 100th post!
*Noise of small brass band playing a fanfare*
I honestly can’t believe I have made it. I have such a short attention span that when I started blogging in December I honestly thought the novelty would wear off it about, ooh, a week? But do you know what has kept me going? Other of course than it being a fantastic procrastination tool (I can’t possibly start that very important piece of work now, can’t you see I’m blogging?).
It’s you! When I first started, I had never even read a blog, and I never imagined other people would be interested in what I had to say, let alone be inspired to say something back.
And now look at me. I am a hopeless addict. Every time someone comments, the attention seeking, praise driven me gives a little cheer ‘Look! They like me!’
So what with this being a moment for reflection and all, I’ve been having a look back through some of the posts I’ve written. It’s fascinating to see how people get here, which posts they like, which they don’t.
I do get a fair bit of search engine traffic for instance from people googling phrases like ‘dirty mummy’ and I always feel a bit bad – I must be rather a disappointment if you’d be hoping to find some sort of lonely housewife porn. It’s the same with Colin Firth – the most popular search term after my blog name. You google Colin and you get me wittering on about eating bagels. You don’t even get a Colin Firth picture, you just get a photo of a bagel! What a swizz.
Sometimes people have googled such random phrases that I wonder how they ever got to me at all – like ‘mummy anal prob’. Nuff said.
The most read post by far (three times as many views as any other) is my teenage birth story. I was 17 when I gave birth to Bee – I used the word ‘lush’ for heaven’s sake – and I didn’t have a clue. Despite that though, it was one of the best things to ever happen to me. I was ridiculously laid back about the whole thing, believed myself to be totally competent, and as a result, I was. The power of positive thinking in action.
My favourite post though is one I wrote very recently about being stuck in a well. (It’s a metaphor Steve…). It’s very easy on a blog, for me anyway, to become stuck in your own little bubble. You write about funny anecdotes within your own family, you blather on about whatever pops into your head, and you don’t for a second think about it having any relevance outside your four walls. And most of the time it doesn’t – it’s nice to entertain people of course, and to think you can make someone laugh, but normally it doesn’t go further than that.
With the well post though, I felt like I made a difference. That sounds terribly arrogant, and I’m not saying I changed the world, but maybe I just touched a few people, prompted a subtle shift in the way they saw their own situation, that could be the start of something. I had some really fantastic comments and emails on the back of that post. It made me feel useful, and made me think perhaps my own stay in the well hadn’t been such a waste of time after all.
So there you go. 100 posts. That’s surely a book? (Publishers who are reading this – I am absolutely up for a book, and will happily divulge as much personal information as is required.)
Seriously though, thank you. Thank you for reading and thank you for talking to me. Thank you for not scoffing and laughing in my face at the ludicrousness of my thinking I can possibly write something that other people will want to read.