“You have a lot of grey hair Mummy,” says Belle as she gets into my bed this morning. Charming. No ‘good morning Mummy’, ‘I hope you slept well Mummy’.
“Er, yes, thanks for pointing that out.”
She snuggles down and I decide to change the subject before she starts pointing out my blackheads or poking the fat on my thighs.
“Belle,” I say, “what would you say are your strengths and weaknesses?”
“What are strengths and weaknesses?”
“They are things you are good at or do well, things about you that you are pleased with, or things you don’t do so well or would like to improve.”
“Um…” she doesn’t looked particularly gripped by the question. “I don’t know. What are yours?”
“Well, I’d say I’m pretty efficient…”
“You’re good at writing,” adds Belle.
“Yes,” I have to agree there, “good at writing. And funny.”
“Yeah, you’re not that funny. Although what you said just then was funny,” she adds, hoping to reassure me.
“What, me saying I was funny is a joke?”
“Yeah!” she laughs.
“Weaknesses… I guess I sometimes say yes to too much work.”
“That is definitely true,” she says. “If someone say to you do blah blah for blah blah pounds you always say ‘yes of course!'”
She clearly knows me well.
“You’re a quick writer too mummy,” she adds, eyeing my notebook and pencil suspiciously.
“So what about you?” I ask.
“I’m a good swimmer,” she says, still with an eye on my notepad. “Can I write them down?”
“Well,” I admit, scribbling furiously, “I’m not writing a list as such, I’m just writing down the funny way that you say things.”
“Hey! You’re writing down everything I say aren’t you?” She narrows her eyes at me in mock annoyance. I read aloud that last sentence as I write it down and she slaps me.
Not quite the reaction I’d hoped for. I think I need to work on my interview techniques.
Photo – my gorgeous girl looking like butter wouldn’t melt…