Mummy, I thought you were a burglar!

I was out early this morning. While everyone else was still asleep I was on BBC Radio Bristol, doing my best to sound intelligent and thoughtful about my Ethiopia trip, and not like a toddler who had accidentally been given a microphone. I got back at about 8am, and the house was still silent, but as I was opening the curtains in the living room I heard some quiet footsteps on the stairs. I turned and saw Belle, arms held out in front of her, Jackie Chan style.

She saw me and looked relieved. “I thought you were a burglar!” she said.

“Nope,” I said, “just me.” And then I thought for a bit. “So you thought there was a burglar and you were coming downstairs to confront me?”

“Yes,” she said, as though I was stupid. She has always been a bit of a feisty one, very protective of her family.

“But what if they hurt you?” I asked.

“They wouldn’t,” she said, “I know kung fu.”

“Do you actually though?” I asked. “Or do you just know how to stand like that with your arms up?”

“No,” she said, “I actually know it.” She kicked her leg up in the air a bit and then looked at me defiantly, as though that proved it. She did look quite scary. It’s probably a Bad Thing to rely on your ten year old twiglet of a daughter to protect you from intruders, but I did feel strangely proud at her courage.

Potential burglars, consider yourself warned. Our home is not for the taking.



  1. 24 March, 2013 / 9:58 am

    My husband was away one night when I heard an almighty crash from downstairs. My first thought was that the cat had knocked something over, but then I saw the cat on my bedroom floor looking as surprised as me. It was then I realised we had an intruder.

    I grabbed a big shoe as a weapon and slowly walked down the stairs with my back to the wall. When I got close to the bottom of the stairs I realised I had a problem – our stairs opened up in both directions to the living room and the dining room. I had no choice but to leap the gap, spinning as I did so so that my back was against the opposite wall, shoe poised ready to thump the person who was about to attack me from one or other side (hopefully not both – I only had one shoe). My years of watching Xfiles had given me expert FBI training!

    I’m afraid I didn’t have to attack my intruder – all that had happened was that a clock had fallen off the wall!

    • admin
      28 March, 2013 / 9:59 am

      Haha! I can picture you now! I went through a phase after watching Point Break where I wanted to join the FBI and would practice vaulting gates just in case I was ever involved in a chase.

  2. 25 March, 2013 / 9:31 am

    Haha, good one. I admire her courage – when I hear strange noises in my apartment I sneak into the little ones’ room to “protect” them (or maybe they just give me more courage…as Gandalf would say) and let my better half go and check what is making the weird sounds.

    • admin
      28 March, 2013 / 9:59 am

      By protect do you mean hold them in front of you like a human shield? :-)

  3. 25 March, 2013 / 1:30 pm

    I’m from Bristol actually! But I missed the epic radio programme lol! Glad you both realised who you were on time, before those skills had the chance of being put to the test. You have a very brave little girl. The other day I heard a funny noise in the bathroom, and tip toed over to have a look (hoping I didn’t see anything). If it was a burglar, that’s probably all I would do, look! Lol

    • admin
      28 March, 2013 / 10:00 am

      I think just having a peep is a good strategy – I’m not sure I’d really want Belle having to put her Kung Fu to the test!

  4. 26 March, 2013 / 8:03 pm

    Haha gotta love that!! That most be like an instinct showing how much you care your loved ones. That’s very sweet of her to be that brave when it comes to defending her family.

    • admin
      28 March, 2013 / 10:01 am

      It is isn’t it? She has always been very thoughtful and protective when it comes to her loved ones.

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