“But hoovering is fun!” insists really-not-very-new-anymore boyfriend. “How can you not enjoy hoovering?”
As I’m sure regular readers will have realised by now, cleaning in general does not feature highly on my list of Fun Things To Waste Time Doing When I Should Be Working. It certainly features less highly than watching Jeremy Kyle whilst eating chocolate Hobnobs, or having a little lie down.
Still, when Vax offered me a go on one of their new Air Force Total Home upright cleaners, I admit I was intrigued. It claims to be the most powerful vacuum cleaner in the world. In the Whole Wide World. That’s quite a claim. As a woman who’s never spent more than about thirty pounds on a vacuum cleaner, I couldn’t help but wonder if the whole experience might turn out to be a little more satisfying if I had a machine that actually picked things up.
And goodness me, does it pick things up…
I should probably warn you at this point, that if you’ve never had a decent vacuum cleaner before, don’t use it for the first time when you have anyone else in the house. They’ll be too disgusted to ever visit again.
The amount of hair, dust and general scum the Vax picked up from my bedroom floor was quite shameful. Really, no one wants to think they’ve been walking around for years on that amount of their own filth.
Once I was done, and had overcome the slight dizziness that the noise and power of the Vax had induced, I was pretty impressed. I wouldn’t go as far as to say I enjoyed the experience, but have to say there was a certain amount of gratification in being able to change the colour of a carpet back to cream, from a previously patchy, grubby brown colour.
Bee seemed less than impressed with the prospect, possibly simply because I was asking her to clean something. “It’s really good!” I assured her.
“Really?” she looked dubious, dragging it up to her attic. (One of its downsides is that it is pretty heavy).
“Blimey, it is good,” she agreed, once she’d attempted to vacuum up various suspicious looking stains. “It’s not like our other hoovers. You don’t have to pick the bits up off the carpet and put them in yourself.”
At over two hundred quid a go, it’s not cheap, but then it is the most powerful vacuum cleaner in the Whole Wide World remember?
It’s certainly made me reconsider my household appliance strategy. Maybe buying one crap, cheap cleaner every six months, and then having to go around after it with a dustpan and brush isn’t the best idea after all – who’d have thought it?
Reassurance too for my new landlord, should they happen to read my blog, (although perhaps it’s best they never do…). At least they can sleep easy knowing I will be keeping their carpets lovely and clean.
*Don’t get excited, this isn’t actually a regular Friday night review slot, I just thought it made it sound cooler. Like a stand up comedy show or something.