My swimwear dilemma

I use ‘swimwear’ in the loosest possible sense here, as actually, I can’t really swim.

Bit of a shocker isn’t it? I’ve never learnt proper strokes or breathing or anything, but I could once manage to get up and down the pool without drowning. I seem to have forgotten though. Now when I try to swim, Belle says I like look a walrus having a fit.

Not sexy.

Because of the shame of not being able to swim, I’ve never really felt I can justify spending money on swimwear, so when we went to Spain last year my choice was between a black one piece that straps my boobs down like I’m auditioning for a male part in a panto, and a ‘bikini’ made up of two very brightly coloured but clashing pieces from a discount bin in Monsoon.

Again, not terribly sexy.

This year I’m only going to Cornwall, but you never know, the rain may let off for long enough for me to want to lie on the beach, with the potential for paddling, so I feel I should splash out* on something that doesn’t make me look like a weirdo.

So, while I was meant to be working, I had a casual browse at Panache Swimwear, and am thinking of buying this:

panache bikini

Should I? Shouldn’t I?

What do you think? My finger is hovering over the ‘checkout’ button, but I’m just not sure. Obviously I’m under no illusion that I would actually look like that in it, but still, it would definitely be better than what I have now. On the down side, if I do buy it, it will most likely rain for the entirety of the holiday.

What should I do?

*See what I did there? Splash out? I’m so funny.



  1. lisbeth
    15 June, 2012 / 12:09 pm

    I think about this a lot, but never actually buy anything…
    I am nearly 40 and have never found a decent swimwear ’solution’.
    Glamorous Anna says that there is a shop in Exeter JUST for bikinis, and they will make you feel and look like a goddess, but you have to spent £150.
    I think the one you are looking at is too low-cut on the hips and would perhaps not be flattering on a mother’s belly…
    There are so fabulous ones at this site: Which I suspect you will find much harder to resist.

    • 15 June, 2012 / 12:12 pm

      The low cut bottom half was EXACTLY my concern – nobody really wants to see all my stretch marks poking out the top do they? It’s so hard to find something that is flattering and covers up the bad bits, but that isn’t frumpy.

  2. 15 June, 2012 / 12:21 pm

    Well I think its pretty and sexy without being slutty or too revealing. While I can’t speak for swimwear, I used to work as a lingerie specialist in a department store (and consequently bought a lot). And from that can tell you that Panache was one of my fave brands. Their bras were incredibly comfortable and made the most of peoples “assets”. As a small boob person, they gave me shape and lift and the larger boob ladies loved them for the support, designs and sexiness. If their swimwear is anything like their lingerie, then definitely go for it!

    • 15 June, 2012 / 8:21 pm

      I’ve never actually come across their underwear before, but I’m definitely going to check it out, as I find it really hard to buy bras that fit nicely and are still very pretty.

    • 15 June, 2012 / 8:20 pm

      Oooh, that is really lovely! It’s pretty and feminine, at the same time as nicely covering up a lot of the wobbliest bits. I bet you looked HOT :-)

  3. 15 June, 2012 / 3:02 pm

    Buy it, buy it, buy it! You will look stunning, and you totally have the boobs to pull of that top (jealous? me? naaaah)

    • 15 June, 2012 / 8:18 pm

      I DO have the boobs for it… *looks down at cleavage*

  4. 15 June, 2012 / 4:22 pm

    Oh I’ve got that bikini and I look just like her in it, my bosoms are better though.*

    I bet you’d look gorgeous in that, I think you should wear it to Britmums Live!

    *Disclaimer: soooo not true. The fabric would make a lovely headband though!

    • 15 June, 2012 / 8:19 pm

      If I wore that I should DEFINITELY win the style award :-)

  5. 15 June, 2012 / 5:35 pm

    I say buy it – because I bet you look better in it than you imagine and let me tell you, when you get to my great age, you’ll wish you had… x

    • 15 June, 2012 / 8:22 pm

      Blimey, you say it like you’re about 50 years older than me! You’re plenty young enough for a bikini.

  6. 28 February, 2013 / 12:38 pm

    Have just stumbled across your page – what did you do? Had a similar dilemma myself a couple of years ago and then decided I was too young (38) to say I was never wearing a bikini again. However, have just tried it on and it’s got a bit smaller…

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