A week in tweets – #firstworldproblems

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This week I’m tweeting as Bee. Bee is 16, and prone to seeing the world through dung tinted glasses, as are quite a few teenagers, so I’ve heard.

Here she is. She looks excited about the prospect of featuring in my blog doesn’t she?

First world problems

Oh mummy, thank you so much for bringing me out to dinner!

When I started writing them, she told me I had to include one with the hashtag #firstworldproblems, but really, I think we can just assume that covers most of the things she thinks about. I have cleared all this with her. (Apart from the photo, so don’t tell her that bit.) She is really fine about it and not at all damaged emotionally by my incessant online mickey taking.

Monday – Went to school. Came home. Lay in bed in the dark watching 30 Rock and eating Mikado. #standard

Tuesday – Why would I pay 80p for one rice crispie square when I could get 12 donuts for £2? #explainsalot

Wednesday – Writing 27th draft of English coursework whilst eating entire sachet of instant whip #shuddadoneabtech

Thursday – Walked forty minutes to school. Tutor cancelled. Walked home again. Found hat on street. #notallbad

Friday Just saw a pigeon with feet. Surprised. Thought all city pigeons had crack addictions and feet ripped off.

Saturday – I feel sick, just for a change. Told mummy. She shrugged. Why does nobody care about my physical health? #foreveralone

Sunday – At @FrankienBennys eating ‘loaded potato skins’. All a bit Ramsey’s Kitchen Nightmares.

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Header photo credit – PetitPlat



  1. 10 April, 2012 / 11:02 am

    I would like to point out that everything I actually write is hilarious and interesting and does not quite so clearly show my emotional attachment to food. Also as with most teenager related things you have got most of the things I would say just a little bit wrong. Also that picture of me is awful and I normally look jolly and adorable. :)

    • 10 April, 2012 / 11:32 am

      You do normally look jolly and adorable, that is very true. The look of misery was brought on purely by the loaded potato skins.

      How did I get the tweets wrong though, when we wrote them together? Oopps. Perhaps it was the problem of trying to read scribbles off a week old napkin…

  2. 10 April, 2012 / 5:23 pm

    Good one! I am really jealous of Bee’s life. In fact it is all coming back to me how I could eat crisps and Angel Delight for dinner at her age and still be skinny as a string bean. I want to go back in a time machine…the only downside was having to snog spotty boys but with the buzz of strong cider even that was an erotic high! Thinking who to tweet as. Must be a ludicrous character. Any ideas?

  3. actuallymummy
    10 April, 2012 / 9:34 pm

    Oh good, so my 7 yr old’s behaviour is right on track for teenagerville then?

  4. 11 April, 2012 / 1:35 pm

    Jeez it’s hard work being a teenager! Bless her for letting you include her.

  5. 12 April, 2012 / 8:32 am

    Oh to be 16 again!

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