I was listening to the radio yesterday when a trailer came on for a programme this weekend. “We reveal,” it said, “why your choice of desktop wallpaper says far more about you than you think.”
(It was local radio. Not exactly ground-breaking political insight.)
Still, it got me thinking, because my current wallpaper is this picture of a kitten:
It’s not even my kitten. I literally googled ‘cute kitten’. Yes, I am that person. When you’re trying to create an online persona for yourself as a gin-swilling, dishes-hiding, heart-of-stone slummy mummy, having a picture of a kitten on your desktop is really not the done thing. It probably says far more about me than I’d really like.
So, I thought I’d write a little quiz, Psychologies magazine style, to help you discover what kind of person you really are, just by looking at your wallpaper. Answer each of these questions as honestly as you can, add up your answers, and your secret personality will be revealed…
QUIZ: What does your desktop wallpaper say about you?
1. Look at the colours in your wallpaper. Are they mainly:
a. pastels, pinks and pale blues
b. primary colours or mid-tone shades
c. black and blood reds
2.If someone asked if they could have a copy of your wallpaper for their own computer, what would you say?
a. Of course! You are thrilled and flattered that they love you so much
b. Sure, you’ll ping over a jpeg when you get a chance
c. No! Why? What are you planning behind my back?
3. Which of these is closest to your wallpaper picture:
a. A cute fluffy animal of some sort, possibly wearing a minature hat
b. A nice landscape or family photo
c. A pile of mutilated limbs against a backdrop of charred ruins. In the background is a small child crying fat, silent tears.
4. When you look at your wallpaper, do you feel:
a. Full of joy, and like you want to rush out and give a homeless person a guinea pig
b. Like you should probably stop staring at the desktop and do some work
c. Like you want to punch a puppy in the face
You are a toddler. Seven years old at most. You might want to consider watching the news more regularly.
You are normal. Well done.
You are quite possibly a sociopath. Call the police and turn yourself in before you acidentally go on a killing spree.
And that’s the end of the test. So go on then, tell all, what does your desktop wallpaper say about you??