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At some point in everyone’s life, they go through a life experience that bridges from adult to caregiver, for the health of their parents. This transition is called role reversal and can take quite a toll on both adults and parents alike. However, it’s important to know that well over 44 million adults care for their parents, according to Parent Giving.

Here are some ways you can better manage your role reversal and reduce the stress that comes with it.

1. Plan Your Limits

Unfortunately, you’re not limitless, it’s important to determine and plan your limits during your role reversal. This involves taking better care of your finances, deciding when and how long you plan to visit your parents, as well as moving your parents out of their home.

2. Respect Your Parent’s Wishes

As much as you have to respect what your parents want, you also have to look for some things they can live without such as dealing with finances or being healthier. This conversation may not be the happiest conversation to have, but important nonetheless. Perhaps your parent would prefer home care packages. When in doubt, remember to respect your parent’s wishes and take their consideration into respect.

3. Work on Healing

As nice as it can be to spend time with your parents, it can also be a struggle due to their old age. Try to approach and hurtful situations with ease and consult a therapist or friend, if necessary.

The more developed in role reversal you come, the more you become parents yourselves. No matter how badly pained you may feel from taking care of your parents, remember the importance of doing it. After all, when you get to be their age, your kids will go through the same experience.

4. Ask Your Family For Help

Usually, a single sibling is assigned to caregiver duties, but the whole family can pitch in to help. The worst thing you can do is try to maintain all the responsibilities yourself. You must realize that there are important decisions to be made that are the whole family’s responsibility. These choices are best discussed before there is an actual emergency. Gather everyone together and have a frank discussion about what you are going to do when these crisis situations arise. It is crucial to plan ahead and have this sort of discussion now.

5. Keep Everything in Perspective

As your parent gets older, their needs will change. This situation is not easy for anyone involved, which makes it very easy to become annoyed and frustrated. Keep in mind that both you and your parent are going through the process together. Though it may be stressful for you, you should keep in mind that it is stressful for your parent as well. While it is alright to be upset, you should be cognisant of your parent’s needs as well. They may struggle to accept care or depend entirely on someone else in their later years. Keep in mind that there are just as many struggles for your parent to deal with as you have to deal with.

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Every since I got back from my trip to Croatia with James Villas a few weeks ago, (read about it here), I’ve not been able to stop thinking about our trip to Brijuni National Park.

Brijuni National Park

Can you see why??

Brijuni National Park is a cluster of 14 islands, just off the Istrian coast. If you’re flying into Pula and staying in that part of Croatia then you really MUST visit, even if it’s just for the day. There are hotels on the main island too – Veliki Brijuni – and it would be a very quick and easy transfer if you wanted to stay in the national park itself.

Brijuni National Park

Easy peasy lemon squeezy

We were staying in a James Villa right up in the northern part of Istria, but even then it was still totally doable as a day trip. They have plenty of properties nearer to Pula too though, so worth checking out. View Post

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When Belle left primary school, it hit me a bit harder than I had expected. I’ve never really been big on ‘firsts’ – first day of school, first whatever else – they are exciting and fun but never moving. 

But when Belle finished primary school, it suddenly hit me that I had no children left to watch in school nativities. No more primary school sports days to go to. No more having to ingratiate myself with the other parents on the playground so as to arrange play dates. Nothing.

It turns out that ‘lasts’ are a bit more moving for me than ‘firsts’.

And then she went to secondary school and every day is an achievement just to get her to go, so that’s a distraction. Bee finished her A-levels and graduated and all of those things are okay because they aren’t the END. Bee can finish things and that’s okay, because Belle stills gets to do them.

Last night Belle brought home her school report for the end of Year 10. It was part of a big pack of information about school uniforms and newsletters and a calendar for the next academic year. I have a paper diary, because I can’t get my head around not writing down dates with a pen, and I have an academic year one because it seems to fit better.

I picked out the calendar and got a pen, ready to write in dates of note. I started at the end, (I don’t know why really, but I do the same with magazines), and the first date was GCSE results day.

empty nest

I text Bee.

‘MY DIARY GOES UP TO THE DAY BELLE GETS HER GCSE RESULTS. I AM NOT READY TO NOT HAVE ANY CHILDREN LEFT AT SCHOOL AND TO NEVER HAVE TO GO TO A BORING CONCERT OR PARENTS’ EVENING.’ View Post

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Iceland the supermarket, not the country.

I’d say ‘unfortunately’, as I really do want to visit Iceland the country, but to be honest, I am such a massive fan of Christmas food that I was totally happy making my way to London in 30 degree heat last week in the name of brussel sprouts and custard filled Christmas puddings.

Iceland Christmas range

Yesssss

If you’ve ever worked in the MEDIA, (fancy), then you will know that Christmas in July is most definitely a THING. It’s when all the brands launch their Christmassy ranges, giving plenty of time for magazines and influential bloggers, like what I am, to talk about their stuff.

I arrived early, as I tend to, (I can’t bear lateness), and thought I’d be able to find a casual Starbucks near by to gather my thoughts and freshen up a bit after my very sweaty tube journey. As it turned out, the area wasn’t thronging with cafes by any stretch of the imagination, so by the time I arrived in the hallway full of Christmas trees, having wandered the streets for half an hour in a heat wave, I looked like I had been pulling a sleigh myself. 

Still, I styled it out – ‘just a summer glow darling!’ – and went up the stairs into a veritable Christmas food heaven. View Post

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Post in association with Fanta.

Well hello there, long time no see!

That’s my fault, as I have been BUYING A HOUSE! My very own house, where I can put up wallpaper and have to be responsible for the boiler. Scary times.

In my mind I imagined that moving into my own house would mainly consist of me skipping happily from room to room, choosing exactly where I wanted to put my plants, but it turns out it’s a bit more complicated and dull than that so far, hence me being a bit quiet.

What better thing to do though when you are super busy than to casually cook three meals from scratch and create a video of it?? I know right? It’s the OBVIOUS thing to do, and I don’t know why more people don’t do it quite frankly, as it’s totally THE way to relax mid-move.

So before you do anything else, you MUST watch the video. I’ll tell you what it’s all about in a minute, but seriously, if you have ever moved house, take a minute to think of me and watch the whole thing as a sign of solidarity. It’s less than eight minutes, which in the grand scheme of things is nothing is it??

Okay, thank you. I will calm down now.

*deep breaths*

As you will have seen when you watched the video, which I KNOW you did, this post is part of a project with Fanta, celebrating the relaunch of Fanta Orange. Fanta has a sexy new spiral bottle shape – an industry first apparently – a new logo, and a new recipe, which means it now has a third less sugar, hence me being challenged to create family recipes with fewer calories.

I have to say too that it actually tastes really good. I like it.  View Post

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